Badger Castle (First "game")

I sat down to really try to get a grip on the syntax of Inform7 and threw together some basic story ideas. The further I got the more a curious story started to unfold. While this was never supposed to be a fully formed experience, it has a beginning and an end and I’d love feedback on how robust the environment is and whether I’m missing stuff that’s obvious to you.

BADGER CASTLE
http://invisiblespiders.com/if/Badger%20Castle.gblorb

Here’s a quick transcript.

[rant=transcript]Start of a transcript of

Badger Castle
An Interactive Fiction by Dan Beeston
Release 1 / Serial number 170403 / Inform 7 build 6M62 (I6/v6.33 lib 6/12N)
Identification number: //DE9AAA00-4636-471A-8DBA-286812B10F37//
Interpreter version 0.5.2 / VM 3.1.2 / Library serial number 080126
Standard Rules version 3/120430 by Graham Nelson

x rug
The long rug is drier and cleaner at its furthest point from the external door.

take rug
That’s hardly portable.

look under rug
You find nothing of interest.

l
Ante chamber
This chamber leads north to the Meeting room. The rug underfoot is thick and soft. Light cascades in through the stained glass windows above. There is a smell, not unlike a dog in a rainstorm.

x windows
They depict the form of Badger Jesus tending to the wounds of “the Leper Fox”. A message of empathy for our fellow animals resonates strongly in this time of uncertainly.

open window
It isn’t something you can open.

smell
The rug is sodden and muddy at one end. It generates all the olfactory experiences of a bayou without any of the charms.

get on rug
That’s not something you can enter.

l
Ante chamber
This chamber leads north to the Meeting room. The rug underfoot is thick and soft. Light cascades in through the stained glass windows above. There is a smell, not unlike a dog in a rainstorm.

n

Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it.

An angry badger sits here with steam gently rising off him. He is poring over some documents of importance.

There is a table here.

On the table are some documents and a tray (empty).

x flag
This depicts Bruce the Bold slaughtering the 700 armies of the cove. It is… heavily stylised.

x table
This is a well made and good looking table with legs that go all the way down.

On the table are some documents and a tray (empty).

x cloths
Gilding

l
Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it.

An angry badger sits here with steam gently rising off him. He is poring over some documents of importance.

There is a table here.

On the table are some documents and a tray (empty).

x tray
Looks like an outbox.

x documents
The Badger slaps down hard on your hand. His wise cruel eyes stop you in your tracks. He asks “What do you want, Boy?”

talk to badger
Your plans to put a cohesive sentence together fall apart under the glare from his twitching eyes. You unconsciously put your hand to the message in your pocket.

i
You are carrying:
a message
an empty mug

x me
As good-looking as ever.

x mug
You see nothing special about the empty mug.

x message
The baker has put 4 buns in the oven but they risk being burned. If that’s not a code someone is seriously wasting your time.

give message
(to the angry badger)
The Angry Badger snatches the message from you. His already furrowed brows clamp down further as he considers this new turn of events. “Know this Boy.” he huffs at you, “Blood will be spilled tonight, but the badger kingdom will prevail.” A chill runs through your spine. You know that this is naive optimism bordering on self-delusion.
He rushes upstairs.

l
Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it.

There is a table here.

On the table are some documents and a tray (empty).

take documents
You grab the documents and slip them into your coat.

i
You are carrying:
some documents
an empty mug

x documents
They appear to be requisition orders for grain and dried meats to the River District.

up

Balcony
There is an office to the north. An empty table lies below.

n

Office
The carpets just seem to get more intense the further into this castle you travel. These ones are a luminescent white and thicker than your mattress at home. Admittedly, this is a low bar to clear. If you go south you’ll return to the balcony.

An unremarkable pen sits on the desk.

A hot cup of tea sits on the desk.

This desk looks expensive. Important things must be written here.

A map of the local lands is on the wall.

s

Balcony
There is an office to the north. An empty table lies below.

x table
You can’t see any such thing.

n

Office
The carpets just seem to get more intense the further into this castle you travel. These ones are a luminescent white and thicker than your mattress at home. Admittedly, this is a low bar to clear. If you go south you’ll return to the balcony.

An unremarkable pen sits on the desk.

A hot cup of tea sits on the desk.

This desk looks expensive. Important things must be written here.

A map of the local lands is on the wall.

take all
map: Taken.
pen: Taken.
cup of tea: Mmm. Tastes good. Your mind starts to wander. You ponder the years of stubborn deadlock in this feud between the Badgers and the Foxes. Rumor has it that the foxes suspected the badgers of the thievery of enormous stocks of food. Badgers do not take kindly to accusations. (even though, let’s face it, we probably did it)

You continue to daydream about battles, escape plans, and eventually what would happen if someone found you drinking their tea in the castle. You blink to your senses.

x map
There are red pins with tiny illustrations of foxes on them. There are… quite a lot of them. Like… A LOT. And seriously heaps at Barker’s Point. So many.

x pen
An unremarkable pen sits on the desk, but not so unremarkable that I’m not… you know… mentioning it.

i
You are carrying:
a pen
a map
some documents
an empty mug

l
Office
The carpets just seem to get more intense the further into this castle you travel. These ones are a luminescent white and thicker than your mattress at home. Admittedly, this is a low bar to clear. If you go south you’ll return to the balcony.

This desk looks expensive. Important things must be written here.

x carpet
You can’t see any such thing.

x carpets
You can’t see any such thing.

open desk
It isn’t something you can open.

s

Balcony
There is an office to the north. An empty table lies below.

d

Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it.

There is a table here.

On the table is a tray (empty).

n
You can’t go that way.

up

Balcony
There is an office to the north. An empty table lies below.

n

Office
The carpets just seem to get more intense the further into this castle you travel. These ones are a luminescent white and thicker than your mattress at home. Admittedly, this is a low bar to clear. If you go south you’ll return to the balcony.

This desk looks expensive. Important things must be written here.

x desk
You see nothing special about the desk.

open drawer
You can’t see any such thing.

s

Balcony
There is an office to the north. An empty table lies below.

d

Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it.

There is a table here.

On the table is a tray (empty).

s

Ante chamber
This chamber leads north to the Meeting room. The rug underfoot is thick and soft. Light cascades in through the stained glass windows above. There is a smell, not unlike a dog in a rainstorm.

s
You can’t go that way.

n

Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it.

There is a table here.

On the table is a tray (empty).

n
You can’t go that way.

up

Balcony
There is an office to the north. An empty table lies below.

n

Office
The carpets just seem to get more intense the further into this castle you travel. These ones are a luminescent white and thicker than your mattress at home. Admittedly, this is a low bar to clear. If you go south you’ll return to the balcony.

This desk looks expensive. Important things must be written here.

i
You are carrying:
a pen
a map
some documents
an empty mug

x documents
They appear to be requisition orders for grain and dried meats to the River District.

write on document
That’s not a verb I recognise.

sign document
That’s not a verb I recognise.

x mug
You see nothing special about the empty mug.

n
You can’t go that way.

s

Balcony
There is an office to the north. An empty table lies below.

d

Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it.

There is a table here.

On the table is a tray (empty).

w
You can’t go that way.

e
You can’t go that way.

d
You can’t go that way.

up

Balcony
There is an office to the north. An empty table lies below.

x table
You can’t see any such thing.

n

Office
The carpets just seem to get more intense the further into this castle you travel. These ones are a luminescent white and thicker than your mattress at home. Admittedly, this is a low bar to clear. If you go south you’ll return to the balcony.

This desk looks expensive. Important things must be written here.

[/rant]

Super valuable.
All my beta testers are hitting the same wall. Thanks so much :slight_smile:

Here’s my transcript:

[spoiler]Start of a transcript of

Badger Castle
An Interactive Fiction by Dan Beeston
Release 1 / Serial number 170403 / Inform 7 build 6M62 (I6/v6.33 lib 6/12N)
Identification number: //DE9AAA00-4636-471A-8DBA-286812B10F37//
Interpreter version 0.5.4 / VM 3.1.2 / Library serial number 080126
Standard Rules version 3/120430 by Graham Nelson

smell
The rug is sodden and muddy at one end. It generates all the olfactory experiences of a bayou without any of the charms.

x rug
The long rug is drier and cleaner at its furthest point from the external door.

lift rug
That’s not a verb I recognise.

look under rug
You find nothing of interest.

x windows
They depict the form of Badger Jesus tending to the wounds of “the Leper Fox”. A message of empathy for our fellow animals resonates strongly in this time of uncertainly.

x self
As good-looking as ever.

look
Ante chamber
This chamber leads north to the Meeting room. The rug underfoot is thick and soft. Light cascades in through the stained glass windows above. There is a smell, not unlike a dog in a rainstorm.

n

Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it.

An angry badger sits here with steam gently rising off him. He is poring over some documents of importance.

There is a table here.

On the table are some documents and a tray (empty).

x badger
He is easily twice your body weight. He wears military garb. I’m not sure if the steam is the rain evaporating off him or if he’s just close to exploding.

x documents
The Badger slaps down hard on your hand. His wise cruel eyes stop you in your tracks. He asks “What do you want, Boy?”

ask badger about documents
There is no reply.

talk to badger
Your plans to put a cohesive sentence together fall apart under the glare from his twitching eyes. You unconsciously put your hand to the message in your pocket.

x message
The baker has put 4 buns in the oven but they risk being burned. If that’s not a code someone is seriously wasting your time.

inv
You are carrying:
a message
an empty mug

give message to badger
The Angry Badger snatches the message from you. His already furrowed brows clamp down further as he considers this new turn of events. “Know this Boy.” he huffs at you, “Blood will be spilled tonight, but the badger kingdom will prevail.” A chill runs through your spine. You know that this is naive optimism bordering on self-delusion.
He rushes upstairs.

x documents
They appear to be requisition orders for grain and dried meats to the River District.

x table
This is a well made and good looking table with legs that go all the way down.

On the table are some documents and a tray (empty).

x tray
Looks like an outbox.

put documents in tray
(first taking the documents)
You grab the documents and slip them into your coat.

You put the documents into the tray.

look
Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it.

There is a table here.

On the table is a tray (in which are some documents).

up

Balcony
There is an office to the north. An empty table lies below.

n

Office
The carpets just seem to get more intense the further into this castle you travel. These ones are a luminescent white and thicker than your mattress at home. Admittedly, this is a low bar to clear. If you go south you’ll return to the balcony.

An unremarkable pen sits on the desk.

A hot cup of tea sits on the desk.

This desk looks expensive. Important things must be written here.

A map of the local lands is on the wall.

x pen
An unremarkable pen sits on the desk, but not so unremarkable that I’m not… you know… mentioning it.

take pen
Taken.

x tea
A hot cup of tea weeps streams of steam into the air at having been so suddenly and recently abandoned.

drink tea
Mmm. Tastes good. Your mind starts to wander. You ponder the years of stubborn deadlock in this feud between the Badgers and the Foxes. Rumor has it that the foxes suspected the badgers of the thievery of enormous stocks of food. Badgers do not take kindly to accusations. (even though, let’s face it, we probably did it)

You continue to daydream about battles, escape plans, and eventually what would happen if someone found you drinking their tea in the castle. You blink to your senses.

x map
There are red pins with tiny illustrations of foxes on them. There are… quite a lot of them. Like… A LOT. And seriously heaps at Barker’s Point. So many.

x barker’s point
One can only assume that’s where the main fox encampment is.

x desk
You see nothing special about the desk.

look
Office
The carpets just seem to get more intense the further into this castle you travel. These ones are a luminescent white and thicker than your mattress at home. Admittedly, this is a low bar to clear. If you go south you’ll return to the balcony.

This desk looks expensive. Important things must be written here.

A map of the local lands is on the wall.

s

Balcony
There is an office to the north. An empty table lies below.

down

Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it.

There is a table here.

On the table is a tray (in which are some documents).

take documents
You grab the documents and slip them into your coat.

s

Ante chamber
This chamber leads north to the Meeting room. The rug underfoot is thick and soft. Light cascades in through the stained glass windows above. There is a smell, not unlike a dog in a rainstorm.

s
You can’t go that way.

x documents
They appear to be requisition orders for grain and dried meats to the River District.

write on documents with pen
That’s not a verb I recognise.

change documents with pen
I only understood you as far as wanting to change the documents.

change documents
What to?

finished
That’s not a verb I recognise.

use pen on documents
That’s not a verb I recognise.

n

Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it.

There is a table here.

On the table is a tray (empty).

inv
You are carrying:
some documents
a pen
an empty mug

up

Balcony
There is an office to the north. An empty table lies below.

n

Office
The carpets just seem to get more intense the further into this castle you travel. These ones are a luminescent white and thicker than your mattress at home. Admittedly, this is a low bar to clear. If you go south you’ll return to the balcony.

This desk looks expensive. Important things must be written here.

A map of the local lands is on the wall.

x tea
You can’t see any such thing.

n
You can’t go that way.

s

Balcony
There is an office to the north. An empty table lies below.

down

Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it.

There is a table here.

On the table is a tray (empty).

put documents in tray
You put the documents into the tray.

put pen in tray
You put the pen into the tray.

put mug on table
You put the empty mug on the table.

lie down
That’s not a verb I recognise.

x flags
Gilding

x cloths
Gilding

quit
Are you sure you want to quit? y[/spoiler]

I guess I hit the same wall as Hanon, although I apparently have less patience.

Let me elaborate on my earlier post a bit.

You commented to Hanon that “all [your] beta testers are hitting the same wall.” It doesn’t feel so much like a wall to me as it does just not having anything to do. When I think of hitting a wall, I think of knowing that I have to do some particular thing–or go some particular place, etc.–but not being able to figure out how to accomplish that.

To take that idea even further, it’s not that I don’t know how to do something here, or even that I don’t know what to do–I don’t even have the first clue why I am in this world at all. Take this early instance for example:

The message. Yes, I probably should have taken inventory, but even having found the message I had to guess that I was supposed to give it to the guard. Granted, this is not a difficult thing to guess, but the point is that I shouldn’t have to guess at all. My character would know that he was supposed to give the message to the badger–presumably that’s my entire reason for being in the castle–but this is never mentioned. Even a simple “I should probably give this to General So-and-so” appended to a “first time” look would have been welcome. I personally don’t think that reverse dramatic irony (that is, when the player doesn’t know something that the character knows, or can be assumed to know).

The fundamental problem here is not the next step being unclear, but of a complete lack of characterization and motivation. I guess from some of the responses that I am a young badger, but “x self” gives me nothing but the default response. Who am I? What am I doing here? Why would I stay behind in the castle after the message has been delivered and I have fulfilled my purpose. IF players will hunt around every nook and cranny of a game to see what they can do, but why should the protagonist of the story do the same? What is his motivation?

That may sound like a bit much to ask from something that is admittedly not a fully formed experience, but I think even the smallest game requires it. Even if whatever transpires in the game turns out to be very different from the way things start out (I’m thinking Curses, for example), the PC needs to have some motivation to get things rolling. This is the bare minimum characterization necessary for a story, in my opinion–especially when we are talking about the open-ended stories of parser IF.

I didn’t get any further than anyone else but I’m a terrible puzzle-gamer. I don’t really care about puzzles at all.

I did enjoy what was there. I think I liked this game because it reminded me of Fantastic Mr. Fox (the movie).

Your writing has promise but you need a lot of practice to give it a higher level of polish and to catch obvious grammatical errors.

Would like to see more, and to know if there’s something we are missing to do in this game.

[spoiler]Badger Castle
An Interactive Fiction by Dan Beeston
Release 1 / Serial number 170403 / Inform 7 build 6M62 (I6/v6.33 lib 6/12N)

Ante chamber
This chamber leads north to the Meeting room. The rug underfoot is thick and soft. Light cascades
in through the stained glass windows above. There is a smell, not unlike a dog in a rainstorm.

x rug
The long rug is drier and cleaner at its furthest point from the external door.

x windows
They depict the form of Badger Jesus tending to the wounds of “the Leper Fox”. A message of
empathy for our fellow animals resonates strongly in this time of uncertainly.

x me
As good-looking as ever.

i
You are carrying:
a message
an empty mug

read message
The baker has put 4 buns in the oven but they risk being burned. If that’s not a code someone is
seriously wasting your time.

x mug
You see nothing special about the empty mug.

move rug
It is fixed in place.

get all
There are none at all available!

smell
The rug is sodden and muddy at one end. It generates all the olfactory experiences of a bayou
without any of the charms.

move rug
It is fixed in place.

smell rug
The rug is sodden and muddy at one end. It generates all the olfactory experiences of a bayou
without any of the charms.

n

Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it
hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There
is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it.

An angry badger sits here with steam gently rising off him. He is poring over some documents of
importance.

There is a table here.

On the table are some documents and a tray (empty).

x documents
The Badger slaps down hard on your hand. His wise cruel eyes stop you in your tracks. He asks
“What do you want, Boy?”

talk to badger
Your plans to put a cohesive sentence together fall apart under the glare from his twitching eyes.
You unconsciously put your hand to the message in your pocket.

give message to badger
The Angry Badger snatches the message from you. His already furrowed brows clamp down
further as he considers this new turn of events. “Know this Boy.” he huffs at you, “Blood will be
spilled tonight, but the badger kingdom will prevail.” A chill runs through your spine. You know
that this is naive optimism bordering on self-delusion.
He rushes upstairs.

x documents
They appear to be requisition orders for grain and dried meats to the River District.

get documents
You grab the documents and slip them into your coat.

l
Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it
hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There
is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it.

There is a table here.

On the table is a tray (empty).

x cloths
Gilding

n
You can’t go that way.

w
You can’t go that way.

I beg your pardon?

e
You can’t go that way.

u

Balcony
There is an office to the north. An empty table lies below.

n

Office
The carpets just seem to get more intense the further into this castle you travel. These ones are a
luminescent white and thicker than your mattress at home. Admittedly, this is a low bar to clear.
If you go south you’ll return to the balcony.

An unremarkable pen sits on the desk.

A hot cup of tea sits on the desk.

This desk looks expensive. Important things must be written here.

A map of the local lands is on the wall.

get pen
Taken.

drink tea
Mmm. Tastes good. Your mind starts to wander. You ponder the years of stubborn deadlock in
this feud between the Badgers and the Foxes. Rumor has it that the foxes suspected the badgers of
the thievery of enormous stocks of food. Badgers do not take kindly to accusations. (even though,
let’s face it, we probably did it)

You continue to daydream about battles, escape plans, and eventually what would happen if
someone found you drinking their tea in the castle. You blink to your senses.

l
Office
The carpets just seem to get more intense the further into this castle you travel. These ones are a
luminescent white and thicker than your mattress at home. Admittedly, this is a low bar to clear.
If you go south you’ll return to the balcony.

This desk looks expensive. Important things must be written here.

A map of the local lands is on the wall.

read map
There are red pins with tiny illustrations of foxes on them. There are… quite a lot of them. Like…
A LOT. And seriously heaps at Barker’s Point. So many.

x desk
You see nothing special about the desk.

search it
There is nothing on the desk.

open desk
It isn’t something you can open.

n
You can’t go that way.

w
You can’t go that way.

e
You can’t go that way.

u
You can’t go that way.

d
You can’t go that way.

s

Balcony
There is an office to the north. An empty table lies below.

s
You can’t go that way.

l
Balcony
There is an office to the north. An empty table lies below.

i
You are carrying:
a pen
some documents
an empty mug

sign documents
That’s not a verb I recognise.

x pen
An unremarkable pen sits on the desk, but not so unremarkable that I’m not… you know…
mentioning it.[/spoiler]

An initial whiff of investment, which quickly evaporated. I liked the description of the NPC though. Less so the player character, because I had absolutely no idea of who that person was or their goals.

Kind of like this thread itself…

Oh wow, no, I didn’t mean it quite that badly. The game had some nice points: I like it that it clued you toward smells, then implemented smelling. Little touches go a long way.

My chief problem was the lack of cluing and guidance, to be honest. There was never a point where I felt, “right, now I need to do this next.”

Oh my goodness. So much great feedback. Thank you all.

I’ve been plugging away making headway on learning the syntax and in the process have been updating the information presented in various points of the experience.
I’ve replaced the original file with the updated one.
http://invisiblespiders.com/if/Badger%20Castle.gblorb

Hopefully it’s more helpful in directing behaviour without giving away the farm.
I do wish that during testing there was a way to turn off everything I knew before testing it :slight_smile:

Yeah, I’m with you on that.

I’ll have to check out the new version soon and see how things have developed.

I’ve played the new version:

[rant=transcript]Start of a transcript of

Badger Castle
An Interactive Fiction by Dan Beeston
Release 1 / Serial number 170430 / Inform 7 build 6M62 (I6/v6.33 lib 6/12N)
Identification number: //DE9AAA00-4636-471A-8DBA-286812B10F37//
Interpreter version 0.5.4 / VM 3.1.2 / Library serial number 080126
Standard Rules version 3/120430 by Graham Nelson

smell
The rug is sodden and muddy at one end. It generates all the olfactory experiences of a bayou without any of the charms.

x rug
The long rug is drier and cleaner at its furthest point from the external door.

lift rug
That’s not a verb I recognise.

n

Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it. There is, of course, the ante chamber you came from to the south.

An angry badger sits here with steam gently rising off him. He is poring over some documents of importance.

There is a table here.

On the table are some documents and a tray (empty).

inv
You are carrying:
a message

x me
I’m just another badger. There’s nothing special about me. I’m a bit more anxious than usual about this civil unrest I guess.

x badger
Dressed in military finery, he is easily twice your body weight. Seems the type that would rather a glorious defeat than a peaceful victory. I’m not sure if the steam is raindrops evaporating off him or if he’s just close to exploding.

talk to badger
Your plans to put a cohesive sentence together fall apart under the glare from his twitching eyes. You unconsciously put your hand to the message in your pocket.

give message to badger
The Angry Badger snatches the message from you. His already furrowed brows clamp down further as he considers this new turn of events. “Know this Boy.” he huffs at you, “Blood will be spilled tonight, but the badger kingdom will prevail.” A chill runs through your spine. You know that this is naive optimism bordering on self-delusion. He rushes upstairs.

look
Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it. There is, of course, the ante chamber you came from to the south.

There is a table here.

On the table are some documents and a tray (empty).

x documents
They appear to be requisition orders for grain and dried meats to be moved to the River District. I suppose it will be nice for the troops to have one last meal before they are each slaughered in battle.

x tray
Looks like an outbox.

x table
This is a well made and good looking table with legs that go all the way down.

On the table are some documents and a tray (empty).

up

Balcony
There is an office to the north. The staircase leads down.

n

Office
The carpets just seem to get more intense the further into this castle you travel. These ones are a luminescent white and thicker than your mattress at home. Admittedly, this is a low bar to clear. If you go south you’ll return to the balcony.

An unremarkable pen sits on the desk.

A hot cup of tea sits on the desk.

This desk looks expensive. Important things must be written here.

A map of the local lands is on the wall.

x pen
An unremarkable pen sits on the desk, but not so unremarkable that I’m not… you know… mentioning it.

take pen
Taken.

x desk
This ornate desk has a single drawer.

On the desk is a cup.

open drawer
There is a bible in the drawer. You pick it up.

x map
There are red pins with tiny illustrations of foxes on them. There are… quite a lot of them. Like… A LOT. And seriously heaps at Barker’s Point. So many.

x barker’s point
One can only assume that’s where the main fox encampment is.

x bible
I’m not really inspired to read a random part of the Bible.

look
Office
The carpets just seem to get more intense the further into this castle you travel. These ones are a luminescent white and thicker than your mattress at home. Admittedly, this is a low bar to clear. If you go south you’ll return to the balcony.

A hot cup of tea sits on the desk.

This desk looks expensive. Important things must be written here.

A map of the local lands is on the wall.

s

Balcony
There is an office to the north. The staircase leads down.

d

Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it. There is, of course, the ante chamber you came from to the south.

There is a table here.

On the table are some documents and a tray (empty).

sign documents
That’s not a verb I recognise.

use pen on documents
That’s not a verb I recognise.

write on documents with pen
I only understood you as far as wanting to write on the documents.

write on documents
You want me to change them?

yes
That was a rhetorical question.

awesome
That’s not a verb I recognise.

change documents
What part of the document do you want to change, and what do you want to change it to?

x documents
They appear to be requisition orders for grain and dried meats to be moved to the River District. I suppose it will be nice for the troops to have one last meal before they are each slaughered in battle.

change orders for dried meats to wine
You can’t see any such thing.

change documents
What part of the document do you want to change, and what do you want to change it to?

dried meats to wine
That’s not a verb I recognise.

inv
You are carrying:
a bible
a pen

x pen
An unremarkable pen but not so unremarkable that I’m not… you know… mentioning it.

use pen
That’s not a verb I recognise.

look
Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it. There is, of course, the ante chamber you came from to the south.

There is a table here.

On the table are some documents and a tray (empty).

s

Ante Chamber
This chamber leads north to the Meeting Room. The rug underfoot is thick and soft. Light cascades in through the stained glass windows above. There is a smell, not unlike a dog in a rainstorm.

s
I feel like I’m the only sensible badger in a castle filled with warmongers. Perhaps I can be of help.

n

Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it. There is, of course, the ante chamber you came from to the south.

There is a table here.

On the table are some documents and a tray (empty).

take documents
You grab the documents and slip them into your coat.

s

Ante Chamber
This chamber leads north to the Meeting Room. The rug underfoot is thick and soft. Light cascades in through the stained glass windows above. There is a smell, not unlike a dog in a rainstorm.

s
I feel like I’m the only sensible badger in a castle filled with warmongers. Perhaps I can be of help.

n

Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it. There is, of course, the ante chamber you came from to the south.

There is a table here.

On the table is a tray (empty).

n
You can’t go that way.

u

Balcony
There is an office to the north. The staircase leads down.

n

Office
The carpets just seem to get more intense the further into this castle you travel. These ones are a luminescent white and thicker than your mattress at home. Admittedly, this is a low bar to clear. If you go south you’ll return to the balcony.

A hot cup of tea sits on the desk.

This desk looks expensive. Important things must be written here.

A map of the local lands is on the wall.

put documents on desk
You put the documents on the desk.

change documents
What part of the document do you want to change, and what do you want to change it to?

change requisition orders
You can’t see any such thing.

e
You can’t go that way.

w
You can’t go that way.

s

Balcony
There is an office to the north. The staircase leads down.

e
You can’t go that way.

w
You can’t go that way.

n

Office
The carpets just seem to get more intense the further into this castle you travel. These ones are a luminescent white and thicker than your mattress at home. Admittedly, this is a low bar to clear. If you go south you’ll return to the balcony.

A hot cup of tea sits on the desk.

This desk looks expensive. Important things must be written here.

On the desk are some documents.

A map of the local lands is on the wall.

quit
Are you sure you want to quit? y[/rant]

Some comments:

[spoiler]First, the major stuff:

  • You did do a better job of hinting the player to give the message to the Angry Badger (should that really be capitalized?), and the message I get when trying to leave the castle does give me a little motivation. The problem is that I still have no idea what I am supposed to do.
  • I suspect it has something to do with the documents, since that is the only thing here that I seem to have any sort of control over. However, all my attempts at interacting with the documents fail, and the failure messages I get are confusing. For example, I finally managed to stumble on “change documents,” but then I am asked what part of the documents I want to change, and what I want to change it to. This seems like an incredibly complex idea to try to get across through the parser.
  • Although it’s not listed in my above transcript, because I didn’t think about it until I was reading the transcript over afterward, I did try to change the destination of the requisition orders. My thinking was that if I changed “River District” to “Barker’s Point,” the supplies might be delivered there instead and the foxes might see that as a peace offering–thus averting hostilities and saving the day. Nothing that I tried was successful (“change documents” followed by “change river district to barker’s point” comes back with “What are you talking about?” Following it instead with “river district to barker’s point” comes back with “I’m not sure but I think you want to change it?”). This is incredibly frustrating. I don’t know if I’ve stumbled upon the answer here and just can’t figure out the exact wording you are looking for, or if I am barking up the wrong tree entirely.

And now the minor stuff:

  • When the angry badger gets the message, he rushes upstairs–but where does he go? I follow him, but there is no one on the balcony and no one in the office, and there doesn’t appear to be anywhere else to go. I get that I’m not supposed to interact with the angry badger anymore, but having him disappear into thin air like that is weird.
  • The game goes back and forth between first and second person. For example, “x self” comes back with “I’m just another badger. There’s nothing special about me. I’m a bit more anxious than usual about this civil unrest I guess.” Examining the badger produces “…I’m not sure if the steam is raindrops evaporating off him or if he’s just close to exploding.” Who is the “I” in the second case here? Is this the same I that gives the clarification messages (“I’m not sure but…”)? It just feels off.
  • Some of the wording struck me as a little off as well. Chills generally run “down” spines, not “through” them. The description of a “good looking table with legs that go all the way down” is… weird. I generally don’t think of carpets as “intense” (“luxurious,” perhaps). Stuff like that.
  • The description of the pen as unremarkable, “but not so unremarkable that I’m not… you know… mentioning it” is a pretty heavy-handed clue, but fair enough. It should still only be shown the first time the pen is examined, though. Perhaps further examination of the pen might provide clues as to what you’re supposed to do with it?
  • When I examine the Bible, I want to see what it looks like, not necessarily to “read a random part” of it. Mainly I’m trying to find some clue as to why a Bible is in the desk drawer. I’m also curious if it is the same Bible that we know, or if it preaches the gospel of Badger Jesus instead.
  • For a game with four locations, it seems a bit odd that two of those locations are, as far as I can tell, empty of anything meaningful.
    [/spoiler]

To add a comment to my comments from yesterday:

[spoiler]We’re still not sure what we’re supposed to be doing when the game starts. Would it be such a bad thing to have an intro like: “You are in the badger army headquarters, the mysterious message tucked safely away in your pocket. You have no idea what it means, but you know that General Irontooth needs to see it as soon as possible. Better get moving!”

If we are thinking as the PC, and not just the player, this is information we will already have. It’s not like we showed up at HQ with amnesia and a strange message in our pocket, right? As players of IF, yes, we’re going to explore, pick up everything that isn’t nailed down, and try to figure out what it is we’re supposed to do. But withholding information that the PC would naturally have seems rather artificial, and (at least in my case) does more to shatter suspension of disbelief than it does to provide an interesting challenge. In this case, we should not have to figure out that we’re supposed to give the message to the angry badger (whose identity we must know, even if we don’t know him personally–surely whoever gave us the message didn’t just say: “Here. Go to HQ and deliver this to the angry, steaming badger you find in the main hall.”); that should be a given. Figuring out what to do after that is where the challenge should begin.[/spoiler]

I Managed to play this to an ending and while satisfactory to reach a finish, I agree with some of the earlier comments about clueing the PC as well as some of the descriptions could be better worded. Also when youopen the drawer in the desk, the Bible should not become part of your inventory unless you GET IT first.
All in all this has the beginnings of a great game and could be expanded upon.
My Transcript…

[spoiler]Badger Castle
An Interactive Fiction by Dan Beeston
Release 1 / Serial number 170430 / Inform 7 build 6M62 (I6/v6.33 lib 6/12N)

Ante Chamber
This chamber leads north to the Meeting Room. The rug underfoot is thick and soft. Light
cascades in through the stained glass windows above. There is a smell, not unlike a dog in a
rainstorm.

smell
The rug is sodden and muddy at one end. It generates all the olfactory experiences of a bayou without any of the charms.

x rug
The long rug is drier and cleaner at its furthest point from the external door.

lift rug
That’s not a verb I recognise.

move rug
It is fixed in place.

n

Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it. There is, of course, the ante chamber you came from to the south.

An angry badger sits here with steam gently rising off him. He is poring over some documents of importance.

There is a table here.

On the table are some documents and a tray (empty).

x badger
Dressed in military finery, he is easily twice your body weight. Seems the type that would rather a glorious defeat than a peaceful victory. I’m not sure if the steam is raindrops evaporating off him or if he’s just close to exploding.

u

Balcony
There is an office to the north. The staircase leads down. From here you can see down onto the Angry Badger. You didn’t realise that badgers could suffer from male pattern baldness but, well, there you go.

n

Office
The carpets just seem to get more intense the further into this castle you travel. These ones are a luminescent white and thicker than your mattress at home. Admittedly, this is a low bar to clear. If you go south you’ll return to the balcony.

An unremarkable pen sits on the desk.

A hot cup of tea sits on the desk.

This desk looks expensive. Important things must be written here.

A map of the local lands is on the wall.

get pen
Taken.

x desk
This ornate desk has a single drawer.

On the desk is a cup.

open drawer
There is a bible in the drawer. You pick it up.

drop bible on desk
You put the bible on the desk.

x map
There are red pins with tiny illustrations of foxes on them. There are… quite a lot of them. Like… A LOT. And seriously heaps at Barker’s Point. So many.

s

Balcony
There is an office to the north. The staircase leads down. From here you can see down onto the Angry Badger. You didn’t realise that badgers could suffer from male pattern baldness but, well, there you go.

d

Meeting Room
This room is larger than it needs to be. A flag with historically important badgers painted on it hangs from the wall. Stairs ascend clockwise and anti-clockwise to a balcony above the flag. There is a stern table with cloths and flags pinned to it. There is, of course, the ante chamber you came from to the south.

An angry badger sits here with steam gently rising off him. He is poring over some documents of importance.

There is a table here.

On the table are some documents and a tray (empty).

give message to badger
The Angry Badger snatches the message from you. His already furrowed brows clamp down further as he considers this new turn of events. “Know this Boy.” he huffs at you, “Blood will be spilled tonight, but the badger kingdom will prevail.” A chill runs through your spine. You know that this is naive optimism bordering on self-delusion. He rushes upstairs.

get documents
You grab the documents and slip them into your coat.

change documents from river district to barker’s point
You cross out “The River District” and replace it with “Barker’s Point”. If anyone were to read these they would take those supplies straight to the camp of the enemy.

put documents in tray
You put the documents into the tray.

You slip the altered documents into the outbox and slip out the front door. The fox army fails to arrive. It seems they were placated by a grand gesture of contrition on behalf of the Badger Kingdom. Over the course of the next few weeks trade opens up again. The Badger King is stubborn and proud. You take a restorative sip of tea. This can’t last forever but it’ll do for now.

*** The End ***[/spoiler]

I left out parts that I had done before and blindly went through expecting them to be as before therefore some parts of the transcript may not show the reasons for my actions.

I hope to see more in the future.

I just read R2T1’s transcript to see if I was on the right track, and indeed I was–but I somehow failed to get the exact wording you were looking for. Perhaps this is partly on me, but that specific wording does not make sense to me, and I tried everything I could think of and failed to stumble onto it. If that’s the solution you’re looking for, I think you need to accept different possible wordings. There’s nothing more frustrating than having the solution but not being able to figure out how to implement it and being stuck playing “Guess the exact wording the author is looking for.”

Guys, thank you so much for helping me out a brand new writer.
I’m glad that I managed to give enough clues that you both worked out what I wanted you to do.

[spoiler]I wish I’d written a better response for when you try to change the documents when you’re not holding them. Suho, you would have got it if I hadn’t left it so generic. I actually put quite a bit of effort into that part of the project. I knew that it was a particularly specific thing to have to get across in the parser.

If you write on the documents, it encourages you to change them. If you try to change them, it encourages you to change one thing to another. (I love that you tried to change dried meat to wine. Getting the army drunk was a fun idea) If you mention both locations (even with odd punctuation) is will nudge you that you’re on the right track. What I lack in puzzle design I make up for in regex knowledge :slight_smile:[/spoiler]

You’re dead right about locations with nothing to do. I think I created the balcony to teach myself about regions and backdrops.

One thing I notice is that sometimes a player would try to answer questions the parser asked.
ie. ‘You want to change that?’
Yes

I’ll have to take a look at continuing ideas over multiple lines.

I also took on board your ideas about continually clueing the player. The pattern on the tea cup gives a clue and if you look at the stained glass windows and then the bible it will also clue the player guiding them to what they need to think about.

Keeping track of first and third person when you haven’t made a conscious decision about it in the first place is a nightmare :stuck_out_tongue:

Thanks again guys. I look forward to trying my hand at something with a bit more thought and substance.

Yeah, you quickly learn to eliminate rhetorical questions from parser prose or allow the player to answer using the “If the player consents” rule.